Parenting Coordination: The Pros and Cons

Parenting coordinators can provide invaluable guidance to help parents resolve conflicts. Consulting a parenting coordinator can be highly beneficial when parents can't agree on child custody arrangements or child care responsibilities.

Courts frequently recommend that parents in high-conflict divorce or separation seek assistance from these experts. However, parents may also independently choose to work with a parenting coordinator to help resolve disputes.

Even co-parents who get along may consult a parenting coordinator when they disagree over parenting plans, the child's education, medical matters, or other issues.

Whether mandated by the court or undertaken voluntarily, learning about the pros and cons of the parenting coordination process is crucial for achieving successful outcomes.

Pros of Working with Parenting Coordinators

Engaging the services of a parenting coordinator can yield advantageous results for co-parenting families. Some benefits of collaborating with a parenting coordinator include:

  • Co-Parenting Skills: Parenting coordinators offer essential education and support, furnishing co-parents with insights into child development, effective communication strategies, and conflict-resolution techniques.
  • Child-Centered Approach: Partnering with a parenting coordinator prioritizes children's welfare by fostering a cooperative environment that creates a healthy co-parenting dynamic.
  • Enhanced Communication: With assistance from a parenting coordinator, parents can significantly improve their communication skills through various tools and methods designed to reduce stress and facilitate better decision-making.
  • Conflict Reduction: Acting as an impartial mediator, the parenting coordinator facilitates dialogue and resolves disputes calmly and constructively.
  • Minimized Court Involvement: By proactively addressing conflicts under professional supervision, parent coordinators help resolve issues outside courtroom settings, avoiding time-consuming legal confrontations.
  • Decreased Legal Expenses: Utilizing the expertise of a parenting coordinator can enable dispute resolution without court intervention—resulting in significant savings on legal fees.
  • Environmental Stability: Consistency is paramount for children during transitional periods like divorce. A parenting coordinator can help establish clear guidelines for co-parenting, helping to create stability and routine in both homes for the child.

Cons of the Parenting Coordination Process

Engaging with a parenting coordinator can offer significant benefits in enhancing co-parenting dynamics and resolving conflicts. However, parents should also weigh the potential cons before committing to the process.

  • Limited Autonomy: Collaborating with a parenting coordinator can restrict parents' ability to make independent decisions, as they need to follow the coordinator's recommendations or assessments. Be prepared to compromise when entering into the parenting coordination process.
  • Dependence: There is a possibility that parents might become reliant on a parenting coordinator for conflict resolution and decision-making, potentially hindering the development of their own communication and problem-solving skills.
  • Financial Considerations: While many find value in leveraging parental coordination services during and after divorce proceedings, it's important to acknowledge the costs. In some states, rates for such services can range around $400 per hour. Expenses may be shared equally between both parties unless otherwise determined by income disparities, mutual agreement, or court order.
  • Privacy Concerns: Disclosed information could be subject to judicial scrutiny depending on the nature of the parenting coordination sessions. Depending on the nature of the parenting coordination sessions, disclosed information could be subject to judicial scrutiny.

Ultimately, the decision to utilize a parenting coordinator must be tailored to the unique needs of the parents involved. While parenting coordinators provide valuable assistance to parents navigating complex custody arrangements and conflict resolution, potential costs and limitations should be considered.

If you are undergoing a divorce or confronting child custody issues and considering parenting coordination, speak with your divorce attorney. A family law attorney can help you navigate the parenting coordination process and ensure that your coordinator is qualified, prioritizes the child's well-being, and is a good fit for your family.

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Dror Bikel

Dror Bikel co-founded Bikel Rosenthal & Schanfield, New York’s best known firm for high-conflict matrimonial disputes. A New York Superlawyer℠ and twice recognized (2020 and 2021) New York Divorce Trial Lawyer of the Year, Dror’s reputation as a fearsome advocate in difficult custody and divorce disputes has led him to deliver solid outcomes in some of New York’s most complex family law trials. Attorney Bikel is a frequent commentator on high profile divorces for national and international media outlets. His book The 1% Divorce - When Titans Clash was a 5-category Amazon bestseller.

To connect with Dror: 212.682.6222 | [hidden email] | Online

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